Worst?

I don't even know. Somehow I don't even feel like living on life. I don't even know why. Everything that happened today just seems so grey and it's killing me. I don't even know why. No one actually cares about me. I eventually cried during Science class thinking of this. I feel.. So.. describable.

I'm so sad that Ili is no longer here with me. She's the one who'd always care about me, asks me if anything went wrong and such. I just can't accept the fact that she's no longer here and NOBODY is actually here for me. ---- said that I'm her best friend but why did she went to --- rather than me?

My did she went to ----- instead of me? Why didn't she realize that I'm actually waiting for her? Why didn't she realized that.. I need her? Why didn't she realized that I'm putting high hope on her and I really really sincerely wanna be her friend.

But then I realize that I have Allah. He will always be here for me *bittersmile* Thank you, Allah. I know that you've planned the best for me. Somehow I wonder that maybe you didn't find me a friend yet so that I'm closer to you. And that's how I know that You'll always be here for me :) Alhamdulillah.

Everything happens for a reason. Who knows if it's the best for you?